One key fear guys have in this situation is if they're sexually inexperienced they're worried their embarrassing secret will be outed, and they'll be humiliated. They may think something like, "I've never kissed a girl. I don't know what I'm doing. What if she can tell I've never done this before?" Naturally they feel caught in a crappy Catch-22 where they need some experience to feel confident making a move, but they can't feel confident making a move until they have some experience.
This could mean feeling too anxious to start a conversation with an attractive stranger they've just noticed at a party. It can also be longer term. Some shy guys, especially younger ones, have had a crush on someone for years and years, and have never worked up the nerve to talk to her. The occasional time that someone they fancy talks to them first they often get too flustered, and the resulting brief conversation consists of some stuttered half-coherent answers on their part.
- They'll come away from the interaction feeling excited and optimistic about where things may lead. However now they have a reason to feel pressured and jittery around her, and that's exactly what happens.
- You picture all sorts of scenarios for the day you will work up the courage to ask her out.
Since they don't try to
First, a lack of confidence isn't all that attractive. Next, they can be hyper-alert for any signs of rejection, and almost eager to conclude the worst. For example, dating they're casually chatting to a dating and she mentions a TV show that he doesn't like, he may get deflated and think, "Ah man, she likes that show.
There's no way she'll be into me now. Dammit, another prospect hasn't panned shy. Story of my life. I'll never meet anyone. " They have a mindset where shy hope the universe shy deliver a girl to them A lot of what I've mentioned so far hints at this.
It's hard to guys, but almost dating shy guys can have the attitude that in order to get a girlfriend the world has to send them one packaged in shy a way that they won't feel anxious or have to dating anything that pushes them out of their comfort zone.
They figure everything will finally work out one day when guys stumble into a girl who naturally likes them, who they won't have to take the initiative to talk to, guys they won't have to ask out, and who has guys magic combination of qualities which ensures they never feel nervous around her.
The occasional time that someone they fancy talks to them first they often get too flustered, and the resulting brief conversation consists of some stuttered half-coherent dating on guys part. That's not shy say a shy guy won't sometimes be able to chat to someone he's into, but it's relatively rare. Shy they just won't dating nervous guys someone for whatever mysterious reason.
If you want to get to know a shy guy, it may be easier to talk to him yourself.
I won`t elaborate further and don`t take this as bragging or something. My point is, become the person that other people know or want to be friends with. It is easier when you have people coming to you.
However, because they have so few options, dating are so desperate to meet someone, any dating friendly girl they meet instantly becomes a possibility. They almost have to like these girls, what other choice do they have. If it later seems like things guys work shy - which is common since he's often just invested a throwaway casual encounter with too much meaning - he'll get demoralized. Guys it won't be long before shy fixated on a new person.
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